My Confusion;Life.s journey...........

'Pain is temporarily,it may last for a minute,an hour ,a day or even a year,but eventually it will subside'these words of Eric Thomas sometimes lift me up when i feel like giving up.At times i feel what i go through defines pain,but seeing the innocent kids running on the street barefooted in happiness push me further for they no not what the future holds for them.Afterall what is my destiny,it got to a point where i accepted that i am an unlucky failure.i feel like i have gone through a lot all because i wanted to get to the top,no need for second place,no way! yet ....what i always fight rather embraces me hapilly. am i editing my script well,i am the hero,the director,the manger,the producer,the villain,how good is my script?am i a free minded person?do i harbour a lot than i want to achieve?am i blaming to many people?do i focus too much on what people say about me?am i living the dream i want io live or living the life of others?am i forgetting that no two people are alike?Everyone sees me to be that strong and bold guy but in my room you will find me in tears everyday.Where am i actually heading to? i always ask myself.Sometimes i just watch these movies;PERSUIT OF HAPINESS,ULTIMATE GIFT,CINDERELLA MAN,SOUL SURFER,CONVICTION,THE GREAT DEBATORS,THE BLIND SIDE,BEN CARSON'S STORY,GIFTED HANDS,ARGO,MEN OF HONOUR and whole lot more.watching these movies have virtually become my comforter.At times i feel like giving up on life afterall we are born to die! yes! but within me i feel i owe the poor and my society and great deal of victory,its as though the world has beaten me permanently to my knee ,i have taken so much blows but am still moving forward,with all these pains,i fear if i quit i will be termed a coward and so i keep fighting.Remember Mohammed Ali?he claimed he was the best even before he became the best. I fear,i feel pain,i get sad yet i do not want to quit.i am always failing,almost every time,yet i want to finish the race i started.Me alone;a student,a worker,a brother and uncle .......a mentor.Its amazing how many great people share life puzzling stories on how they suceeded,overcome every turbulation to get to that destination,a venue that defines victory over pain.

How close am i?when will i ever get there?when will i ever say i am worth living with confidence?what am i doing wrong?am i leaving God out of the game?am i not working hard enough? Those of you who are making a difference,just keep going far cos you give me hope.i believe that one day ,just one day ,i will redefine myself as a brand of hope for others.I see life to be a game but life is war.its either you win or you loose.you decide.Many great men failed a 1000 times yet just one day they suceeded. yes! they did.I put in my very best,yes i do,i sacrifice every little thing,but.....what i am doing wrong#i wanna be a #gamechanhger.i am here for a purpose,even if it was wedlock,it happened cos it needed to.I want to go far so as to liberate others with greater challenge.May be am not sacrificing enough,may be am not valuing every second,maybe am taking my eye off the lens,just may be.That reminds me of olympics 1992,Barcelona,Derek Redmond was favoured to medal in a 400 meter sprint.This guy had severe pain 150 meteres into the race,he leaped in pain with a support from the dad who beat security to help his son,his father wanted him off the track but he insisted and limped in pain to finish what he started,so determined he finished the race and had a standing ovation from over 65000 people and was awarded a medal for his determination.Even in soo much pain he never gave up.I will get there just because you believe in me,i choose to win.